Why women are more likely to cheat than men

May 15, 2009 | Filed Under Small Talk 

I read a fascinating article today that made the case that women are much more likely to cheat then men in today’s society.   Here’s why:

1.   Women are taught by social norms to believe that they are naturally monogamous.  This becomes part of their identity.

2.   Because most women think of themselves as naturally monogamous, they do not think they have anything new to commit to.  To them, monogamy will come natural.

3.   Most women start a natural increase in testosterone levels between the ages of 27 and 33

4.   This increase in testosterone creates natural, biologically based desires for “new” relationships

5.  Since women are not prepared to deal with these new feelings (unlike men who know they are prone to wander), they have not built healthy coping mechanisms

6.  Initially, because they don’t understand their new feelings, women feel guilty

7.  The guilt leads to a sense that something is wrong, most often with the marriage

8.  Belief that the marriage is the problem provides the perfect justification for indulging these new feelings in a new relationship

I thought this was fascinating information, assuming it is true.   Totally destroys some deeply held beliefs that our culture teaches us.

Because of the fact that most women now get married between 24 and 27 years old,  the increase in testosterone levels (and higher sex drive) corresponds with the dulling of the attraction bonds that women feel for their husbands, and provides the perfect storm for affairs to occur between 27 and 33.  And the data suggests that indeed, this is the most common time that women have affairs (also seems the most common age for female teachers to have sex with their students, if the news reports are any indication).

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