Some Random Relationship Tips
January 22, 2012 | Filed Under Relationships
- Your girlfriend should not be the person you go to when you need to vent.
- Don’t expect your girlfriend to be your mom
- Sickness is not attractive. Even less if you’re whining about it.
- Don’t broadcast your weaknesses.
- Restrained vulnerability is ok (show that you have a heart). But frequent vulnerability diminishes you.
- Don’t seek sympathy from your girlfriend.
- Don’t play the victim (displays weakness)
- Don’t complain incessantly around her
- Don’t appear out of control
- Don’t suffocate with attention or expectations
- Pace things out.
- Feel out the natural, healthy rhythm of the relationship, and let it ebb and flow
- Maintain individual interests
- Aim for an “80% my life”, “20% her” division of thought and time and effort
- Sometimes it’s better to just not say anything
- Wait for her to initiate contact at least 50% of the time, preferably more
Most of these tips boil down to these principles:
1. Don’t try to meet all of your needs in one person.
2. Let other people in your life who love you unconditionally (and less based on attraction) provide you comfort
3. You’re number one task in a romantic relationship is to remain attractive, so it’s important to learn what’s not attractive or appropriate within such a relationship.
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